Sunday, April 17, 2011

Restaurants You Might Visit Just So You Could Steal Something With Their Name on It

As you may already know, I've been traveling around the state of Florida meeting new folks and taking in the local cuisine. In doing so, I'm often tickled by some of the names of the restaurants I come across.

Some are classy, some are creative, and some are just downright clueless.

Since I always carry a pen and scratch pad with me in the car (for those rare times when I have an idea worth keeping) I started jotting down some of the more unusual restaurant names to share with you. I even included the cities in case you want to drop by and filch a menu or mug when you're in the neighborhood.

Chinee Takee Outee (Jacksonville)  I love Chinese food and I love any restaurant whose name invokes the mysteries of the orient. This little dive certainly does because it's a mystery as to why any sane restaurateur would pay good money to set up a joint and then name it this. Unless of course the owner relocated here from West Virginia, at which point his stab at the Chinese language makes complete sense. But every time I drive by, I have to smile.

Gas (St. Augustine) I imagine they decided to adopt this moniker because the building may have been an old gas station. Perhaps it was. But the place has had so many tenants and has undergone so many renovations over the years that any semblance to a gas station is long gone. Sorta like welding two wheels onto a horse then calling it a bicycle.

Pho King Noodle House (Jacksonville) Not really sure what to make of this one but I hope the noodles are good. I mean really good. Because this isn't just any noodle house. This is The Pho King Noodle House.

Fu King Restaurant (Lake City) Another oriental restaurant with a name that leaves little to the imagination. Good thing these guys aren't located in Jacksonville. Then they'd be duking it out with the Noodle House for the title of best Fu King restaurant in Jax.

Dogwater Café (Clearwater) This name is about as unappetizing as they get, especially for those of us who own dogs. I mean, what were they thinking? Was "The Litterbox Brasserie" already taken?

Dirty Dicks Crab House (Panama City) Another one that defies explanation. I don't know about you, but I make it a point to steer clear of any restaurant whose name includes both unhygienic reproductive organs and a parasitical venereal disease.

Phylthy Phils Waterfront Cafe (St. Pete Beach) Not as bad as Dirty Dicks. But not much better, either. Besides, word on the street says that Phil has crabs, too.

Gassey Jacks (Orange City) Not to be outdone by the St. Augustine restaurant with the similar name, this establishment at least has the integrity to identify the guy responsible for all the gas.

Better than Sex (Key West) I ate there. It's not. 

Lulu’s Bra and Grill (Fernandina Beach) Methinks the guy they hired to paint the sign for this popular joint started in on the project after downing a couple of six packs. Since the restaurant was just getting on its feet and probably didn't have the cash to redo the sign, they just let it ride. The rest is history.

Mema’s Alaskan Tacos (Tampa) Nothing gets my saliva running like the smell of grilled beef, sizzling onions and sauteed chilies wrapped up in a warm, cheese-filled tortilla. And who better to create this delectable south-of-the-border creation than those who have honed this culinary craft over the centuries. That's right: the Aleuts. Nobody dishes up better tortillas, refried beans and frosty margaritas than those who tramped across the Bering Strait only to settle in a state that is best known for grizzly bears, ice cubes and goofy politicians.

Molly Goodhead’s (Ozona) For some reason this place has been popular since day one. Of course it caters mainly to rising CEO's, professional athletes from the visiting team, and members of the construction trades. Although occasionally some beefy girl on a Harley has been known to stop by. Don't know what that's all about. 

B. O.’s Fish Wagon (Key West) Any eating establishment that has B.O. in the title is worth driving by. And because it looks like a dump, that's exactly what most people do. But the food is very good. And here's the deal: if you go to B.O.'s for lunch, be sure to ask for the 'Daily Special.' Doing so will get you a sandwich far below the price they charge for tourists. Shhh. Don't tell anyone.

Cheap (Tampa)  You gotta give 'em credit. At least they're honest. 

Junk Food Jacks (Clearwater) Another joint with the integrity to own up to what really comes out of the kitchen. 

O’Boobigan's (Clearwater) When the original Hooter's opened on Gulf to Bay Blvd some 20-odd years ago, who could've predicted the impact it'd have on the culinary world. Soon dozens of copy cats began popping up all over Pinellas County to cash in on the Hooter's vibe: Melons, Headlights, Knockers, Mugs & Jugs, O'Boobigans... Alas, only a few remain. O'Boobigan's Irish Pub is one of them. (Personally I've never been much of a frequenter of these mammary-influenced establishments. As far as I'm concerned, if you've seen one, you've seen 'em both...)

So...these are some of my discoveries.

What are some funny restaurant names in your neck of the woods?

68 comments:

  1. We have a Pho King as well! The husband and I have always gotten a kick out of it. Off of your list I really like the Takee Outee.

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  2. @Lauren. Really? You mean there's more than one? LOL. And yes, the Takee Outee always makes me chuckle when I drive by.

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  3. Nothing too outlandish or nasty-sounding. Just places like Da Reel Boudin Spot, Donutlicous, Max 'n Cheese, Moon Wok, Shalom Donuts, and the White Rhino Coffeehouse.

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  4. We have "Dan Good" Pizza here in Michigan! Actually it's pretty Dan Good!

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  5. Oh, I forgot, there is also "Wok Inn" Chinese Restaurant....

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  6. @Melanie. With a name like that, the pizza better be good! lol

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  7. JoeMama's, in Millbrook, Alabama. Great burgers and hot dogs!

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  8. Munchie's Cafe...it's right around the corner. It was featured on 'Man vs Food' (Travel Channel). Food won..hottest wings ever!

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  9. Boobies in Boise

    xo, shannon
    www.livingwithumami.com

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  10. @Sharon. JoeMama's? Gotta love it! Sorta like that pizza joint: YoMamaKnows. They guarantee your pizza delivery in 10 minutes or whenever...

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  11. @Janet. Hmmm. Munchies Cafe. They must be popular with the late-night college crowd. ;-)

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  13. @Shannon. Oh man...Boobies sounds like it should join the other like-minded joints here in Florida! Do they served grilled seafood in Idaho? If so they'd be known for their Shrimp on the Barbies at Boobies in Boise. :-D

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  14. The Laughing Tiger :) its a Thai place. We have a Wok Inn too..

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  15. Dim and Den Sum - awesome food truck with Asian cuisine in Cleveland
    Roadkill on rt 66 in I think Arizona - I ate there when roadtrippin cross country. All the food on the menu had the name of something that was just run over and plenty of dead stuffed animals all over the place.

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  16. @Maria. These are both destined to be classics! Dim and Den Sum for the excellent play on words, and Roadkill for the whole conceptual sorta thing. Y'know if Sly, Bruce and Arnie had thought of a restaurant theme like this instead of Planet Hollywood, they just might have a few more dollars in the bank, lol.

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  17. @ Warren. Its a teeny little burger place on a side road. It's actually named after the owners dog Boobie, who was given the name b/c he wouldn't stop suckling as a pup. Story here: http://205.234.135.68/~boobiesb/boobies_boobie_story.php

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  18. @SweetUC. Well, I guess if one was to sit down for dinner with a nearby, it would probably be best if it were laughing (drooling, on the other hand may be some cause for concern!)

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  19. @shannon. Great story! (But even tho' I know that the place is named after a a pit bull/chihuahua/german shepherd mix, I'm sure it still brings a wink and grin from most folks who pass by!)

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  20. Here in Houston we have a soul food restaurant called My Food's All That.

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  21. very funny! I always have to stifle a chuckle whenever I pull into "Kum & Go" for gas

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  22. @Pretend Chef. LOL. Now that's good!

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  23. @Nancy and Vijay. Thanks! (Good thing that gas station isn't next to Molly's, lol).

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  24. You had me giggling at some of those restaurant names! Sadly, we don't have may humourous restaurant names around here (or maybe I just need to pay more attention). Great post. :)

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  25. Well, you already got Dirty Dick's Crabhouse which is here in PCB... I can't really think of any others here that are that weird but in San Francisco I always loved the name "Squat & Gobble Cafe" ..

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  26. @Laurie@The Baking Bookworm. That's okay, you can always visit Florida to get your fill of quirky restaurant names!

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  27. @Leslie. Squat & Gobble? LOL. Do they sell franchises? Seems like they'd fit right in around here!

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  28. There is a local Dim Sum place here named "Hung Far Low" =)

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  29. @sweetkd. LOL! But this is wrong on so many levels! (I can't even begin to imagine what's on the menu!)

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  30. You are too funny! I can't believe some of these places exist.

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  31. @ Dawn. I couldn't made these up! Have you passed by Gas on Anastasia? They just opened down the road from Ring of Fire.

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  32. Warren, please visit Alaska some time and you can have the pleasure of dining at the Turnagain Arm Pit BBQ shack.

    It's located on a beautiful stretch of the Turnagain Arm of the Cook Inlet, surrounded by mountains about 15 miles south of Anchorage. Interesting pan-Southern BBQ, lovely setting, cute name -- it has the full trifecta.

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  33. @Alaska Food and Wine. It *is* the trifecta! One more item I will have to add to my bucket list! :-D

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  34. I need to go to Florida and visit all of these places and laugh! Sitting here, I cannot think of one good restaurant name other than my local Indian restaurant where I am greeted like an old friend and where they serve excellent food - it's called 'Asif'.

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  35. Wow this is great! More than anything, it made me miss the 31 day road trip I took with my bf around Florida. What an amazing state! I think my favorite food was in Miami. Too bad I didn't pay attention to the names of the restaurants--I was probably too hungry or...yeah, I was too hungry.

    Btw, it's better to walk out of 'Better than Sex' saying,"No it wasn't" than "Yes it was" for more than one reason--but one is that you won't get in trouble. Win!

    Thanks for stopping by my blog, glad I checked yours out!

    -Karissa

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  36. @Kookie Girl. Well, just let me know when. As you can see, I have quite a handle on the funny places. :-) But I must say, Asif is right up there with them!

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  37. @bakingforhersoul.com Thanks for dropping by Karissa. I knew after reading some of your winsome blog that you'd feel very comfortable here. lol. Anyway, I concur on your insight re: Better than Sex. I probably saved myself a lot of grief (and a night sleeping on the floor next to the bed) by doing so. :-)

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  38. @Emily. It was! :-) Thanks, as always, for dropping by.

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  39. LOL I seriously love some of restaurants names. Very bold and creative!

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  40. You are lucky to experience only gas at a couple of restaurants. In Rossville, near chattanooga, you can enjoy the "Terdon Restaurant."

    I've heard of special sauce, but this Terdon garnish is over the top.

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  41. @ Angie. Bold and creative they are! (and some just lead to head-scratching, lol). Thanks for coming by. I try to post weekly so drop in often.

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  42. @Dean Arnold. I remember the Terdon! I also remember the kids having fun saying it (with lots of giggles) whenever we drove thru downtown Rossville when they were little.

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  43. I've got a handful of interesting photos I just uploaded to Facebook. The Terdon made the cut.

    http://www.facebook.com/media/set/fbx/?set=a.10150159936973651.287968.599298650

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  44. Interesting info. I am really looking forward to visiting your country!

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  45. @Eftychia. Thanks! And if you and the fam make it down to Florida, I know a couple of great places where we can all go out to eat, as you can see. :-)

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  46. O'Boobigan's is my favorite...maybe because I'm breastfeeding...?

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  47. @Abbey. LOL! So glad you and the little one are doing well! I remember your posts from back in the day, longing to make it thru the next 6 or 8 months. :-) Good to have you back!

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  48. There's nothing quite so amusing in Utica. But we'll be heading to Naples, FL in another week, any recommends.?

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  49. @Joanne. Naples you say? Hmmm. I get down that way a bit but I haven't found anything yet that would make one chuckle, lol. But I know there are plenty of great places to eat if you are looking for names that, how shall I say it, sound normal. :-)

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  50. Warren, great post! Haven't laughed that hard in a while! Thanks for stopping by my blog and FB! I'm following you now! btw I don't see you on FB. It's https://www.facebook.com/pages/Epicurean-Mom/206309979387280. I really really find your blog amusing! :)

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  51. @Epicurean Mom. Thanks for dropping by. Glad my blog brought a smile. I'm on Facebook here: https://www.facebook.com/TableforTwoCookbooks. I'll be looking for you. :-)

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  52. Hi Warren! I like The Duck & Bunny, a "snuggery" in Providence. Lots of yummy crepes, cupcakes and tea sandwiches. I'd tell you what's in the Bunny Bleu or Duck's Nicoise, but wouldn't want to spoil the surprise if you visit Providence someday. I haven't ventured over to the "Duck Side of the Moon" yet on their "Floyd Fridays", but someday, when my work is done I'll go and have some fun!

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  53. @Lin Ann. Now you've got my curiosity piqued! Perhaps I should plan a New England demo/book signing tour this year. :-)

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  54. These are some great names. And I tend to have sticky fingers when it comes to stealing things from restaurants with their names on it. It's how my husband has the majority of his pint glasses for his beer! ;)

    Thank you for your comment on my post about plastic bags. If you liked that post, be sure and check out the one I just followed up with about plastic bottles!

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  55. @Emily Z. Thanks,glad you enjoyed! I'm headed back over to your site now. Take care1

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  56. Just outside of Fairbanks, Alaska, owned by a thin man named Richard, is Skinny Dick's Halfway Inn.

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  57. thanks for sharing sir!great post!

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  58. @Erin@EKat's Kitchen. Oh man, Erin, yer killin' me! (Although I had to read it twice to get the full effect, lol!)

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  59. @Sianna. Drop by anytime, Sianna. More buffoonery to come. :-)

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  60. I've been olando last thanks giving holiday. Nothing opened. hahahaha...
    I'm living in HongKong now, I can see a lot of restaurants.... "~~~ king"
    They love it.^^*

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  61. Hilarious post! Someone already mentioned it, but I giggle each time someone mentions meeting up at "Squat and Gobble" in San Francisco. Plus, I recently saw something on the news in Austin (hometown) about a burger joint in Waco called Fat Ho Burger. I wish I was kidding. Ha!

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  62. @Phoebe Chung. I can imagine the possibilities on Hong Kong! :-)

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  63. @redvelvetlife. Glad it brought a laugh, Kristen! And yeah, I saw the news item for Fat Ho. She seems to be getting lot's of press over that one!

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  64. OMG!!! You are hilarious! You had me laughing out loud! Thanks for following me at the Table of Promise!! I am so glad you asked me to check out your site. I can't wait to read all your posts!

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  65. Oh! And I live in washington heights in NYC and there is a Ho Lee Chinese Restaurant, and it's right across the street from a church.

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  66. @COB. Thanks! I'm glad you've enjoyed the posts. Drop by often, there's always room. :-) And about the Chinese restaurant across from the church? Hmmm. I guess if one is going to have a restaurant across from a church, it's probably a good thing that it too is a hol lee place. lol.

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